This is how it goes......in concordance with the prophecy......

It is Thanksgiving. I know I've got a lot to be thankful for, but somehow it all seems, well, unworthy. I've got a great job, a home, pets, luxuries, friends, a great church, wonderful parents, and even siblings. (ha). I guess its more that thankful isn't the right word. But what words work when it comes to the Creator of all things. The answer, to me at least, is nothing at all. All I can do is to continue to lay down my life for Him and give Him my trust in everything.

It feels great to give God my trust. I know I've been doing that recently....something that I thought I've experienced before, but I now know that I'm actually doing it!!! How do I know this....because I don't trust my own heart. My heart and mind have been going haywire for a while now, but God is keeping me where I am at. He is speaking to my heart and giving it peace.

I want to be a history maker. I want to give the gifts that God gave to me away. I'm going to make something of myself. I'm going to live life worth living. It may not seem like much to some of you right now, but I am incredibly different now than I was just seven months ago. I had my heart shattered that long ago by a young man who, at one time, loved me. I was terribly weakened by this event, but was given strength by God to keep stepping forward. However, I am still so unsure of myself around people I don't know. I am very trusting though, which is not necessarily a good thing. I tend to delve right in to deep personal subjects because well....that's my life. My life is anything but ordinary and shallow.

Wow, I'm way off track but I don't care. Anywho, life is nuts in a good way. I know who my closest friends are now that I'm out of school. It's a bummer because I don't get to see some people that I was once close to very often anymore, but God has blessed me with a few wonderful girls who are constant. Alison, Beth, E3, Elizabeth, Lolie, and Rachel. Thank you girls for being there for me!!!!!

So yeah. I don't really expect hardly anyone to read this. I just wanted a somewhat obscure place to write things down. If people read this....I hope it's not to lull you to sleep.